Usually, victims of conjugal violence feel isolated, lonely, and are filled with fear. Therefore, even if you might be hesitant to help, the simple act of reaching out and letting a victim know that you are there to support them, can provide tremendous relief.
If a victim does decide to confide in you, listen to her without passing judgement. However, always make sure that both you and the victim are in a safe environment. Also, it is imperative that you do not bring up the issue in front of others and most importantly in front of the victim’s partner.
Finally, help the victim access support services such as talking to a social worker, attending support groups and help her find information about her rights.
- Don’t isolate yourself
- It’s important to confide in someone you trust and with whom you feel comfortable discussing your situation.
- Seek help
- There are many resources available.
- For example, you can talk to a social worker who will listen to you, give you information about your rights, and advise you about your options.
- This service is free and confidential.
- Call the police and report the incident
- It’s important to write down the complaint file number so that you can refer to it later.
- However, once a complaint has been filed, the decision to prosecute is not yours to make. The Director of Criminal and Penal Prosecutions decides.
- Go to a shelter if you don’t feel safe at home
- Shelters are secure and confidential locations.
- You can live there for a certain period and have access to the support of social workers who will help you start your new life.
- Services offered by shelters include individual counselling, support groups and accompaniment.
- Some shelters also have social workers who speak your native language, so you can access information in your own language.
- These services are free and confidential.
If you’re a victim, you’re not alone and you have the right to safety! Don’t be afraid to ask for help!
Conjugal violence is not tolerated in Canada, in all shapes and forms. If you are worried about the safety of yourself and your children, there are several resources that can help you. See “Info & Help” for more information.
REMEMBER… You have the right to be free from abuse and you can break free from the cycle of violence!
Is conjugal violence a private or public issue?
Conjugal violence is NOT considered a private issue but rather a social problem, which needs to be openly discussed. Furthermore, in Canada, conjugal violence is not tolerated.
Also, the idea that conjugal violence is a private matter further ostracizes the victim and keeps them under the control of their partner. It also prevents them from seeking any form of help.
Why would a woman in a violent relationships stay with their partner?
There are a number of reasons why a woman would decide to stay with their abusive partner. Some women have hope that their partner will change (stop their violent behaviour), others feel guilty about breaking up their family and there are also women who believe they are not financially independent enough to make it on their own.
If a partner seeks help for their violent issues, will the abuse stop?
Therapy can address violent behaviour but it is not a miracle solution. The first step towards change is for the partner to recognize that they need to change. Furthermore, the consequences of the violence (including both physical and psychological) will not go away on its own. It is important that the victim finds a way to heal from the effects of the abuse (for example, by talking to a social worker, by attending a support group, etc.)
Can men be victims of conjugal violence?
The source of domestic violence is relationships characterized by domination, meaning that both men and women can be victims. In Quebec, about 24.7% of reported cases of domestic violence involve male victims (2022).